It started when I was 8 and ended with the words “I better leave you alone now then” that was the day that I started my periods. I remember that because it seemed to be the best day of my life. I was finally free to be a child again. My mom said those words as she phoned my grandmother to tell her the news “Chloe is a young woman now, she’s finally started.” I had been a woman from the age of 8 when my child innocence was taken away from me by that monster and now to her I was a woman while all I have ever wanted was my childhood back. I still feel I’m being abused not be given that chance to be a child again and the whole secrecy about the abuse make me wonder why I told the police if everything about it is still hushed up, hushed up like when it was happening. Why do I still suffer? Why is it still happening, why can’t I be free?
by chloe on 1 Apr 2005
I was raped when I was 5 years old and ever since then I could not deal with the fact that a 40 something year old rape me. He was so close to the family, how do you get over that? I know it has been a while since that has happened, but I still think that it was my fault. How do you get over this?
by Roxanneon 1 Apr 2005
I was sexually assaulted when I was 18 years old and my attacker was never caught. I think the fact that he got away with it hurts more than the attack itself. I was on my way to school on morning and a man came up behind me and wrapped his arm around my neck and I couldn't breath. I remember his smell and him speaking into my ear as if he knew me. I passed out and when I came to I realized what was going on. I couldn't believe it. Next thing I knew he had pushed me into my car and made me take off my pants. The whole thing probably lasted about a half an hour but it felt like forever. My boyfriend at the time made me feel as if it was all my fault and he started raping me all the time, until finally I just stopped fighting him, because it was easier than having to explain or hide black and blues eyes. It took me almost a year to get out of that relationship, and realize that none of what happened was my fault.
by Jesikaon 1 Apr 2005
Me violaron en mis 4 años bday de agoDespite cómo intento difícilmente olvidarme de él, él no salgo. Tengo pesadillas, caí extraescolar mi año del estudiante de primer año de la universidad porque no podría concentrarme o enfocarme. Rebané mi muñeca dos días después de la violación. Había conseguido al punto donde apenas no podría tomarlo más. Y en alguna parte interior profundo, me siento como si no sucediera, que él el couldn\'t ha sucedido, pero hizo. Podía afortunadamente hablar con alguien antes de que pensara en hacer algo estúpido otra vez. No dije a mi familia para alrededor de un mes y una mitad, y puesto que había sido bueno en la escuela, ella sabría que algo era incorrecta. Diario despierto con los rasgones en mis ojos de las pesadillas que la violación trajo adelante. Intento no ser solo, y si soy, yo miro siempre alrededor. Veo a veces su coche, y me apenas siento tanto odio, hacia él. Entonces el odio da vuelta a mí, "su mi avería, yo no debe haber bebido cualquier cosa". Pero bebí y todo este dolor es quizá mi avería.
by cristal on 1 Apr 2005
I was molested weekly by my dad as far as I can remember until I was 6 years, old until my parents divorced. My mom never knew though. I felt like I was my dad’s play thing, like a blow up doll or something. I always wondered what I did to make him do this to me. He would use his hands and fingers and actually put him inside of me. And I was only 6. I am 14 now and I only said something 2 years ago. I was having so many nightmares, I wasn’t sleeping and I was always scared and paranoid. Whenever someone would come up behind me I would always jumped. One day my teacher came up behind me and I jumped and turned around and hit her in the stomach. She realized that something was wrong and asked to meet with me after school. So I did and she asked me why was I so jumpy all the time. I started crying and told her everything. The school contacted my mother and it all went south from there. I can’t ever talk to my mother about it and I don’t know why. This is my story and bless everyone on here who had the dignity to post there message.
by Angieon 31 Mar 2005
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This site is offered for support of other survivors, it is not meant to be a substitute for any kind of professional help. I don't have any qualifications or training in therapy, I am by no means a professional. I claim no responsibility for the use of this web site, use of content, or content of any links leading from this site. If you are in a crisis situation I urge you to contact your local rape crisis center or health care professional.