This happened last year and I can remember that day like it was yesterday. It hurts so badly but yet I feel like I am cold hearted because I never feel anything at all when it comes to this matter. I feel like even though a year has gone by I am still in shock. See it was this guy that lived in the same apartment complex as me and that day I was going to my cousinís house. He offered me a ride and at first I refused but that day I was so mad because I got into an argument with my mom so I decided to take the ride. He asked me if I wanted something to drink in the car and I said no. I thought we were on the way to my cousinís house but I then noticed he was going another way. We got out of the car and he went inside a liquor store, he told me he just wanted to get it because he wanted to drink on his own later. He then drove up to a hotel and when I asked him where he was going he said that he had his clothes there and asked if I can go with him to give him a hand. So we got upstairs and I felt so uncomfortable, I had a bad feeling so I called my friend trying to give him hints but I was too scared. He hung up the phone on me and he started touching me. I told him to stop and he ripped my shirt off. I struggled with him for a long time trying to keep him off me. He finally stripped me down I felt so disgusted and embarrassed. I couldnít believe it, I donít know how long I struggled with him it felt like hours. Then finally he went inside of me. I felt like I had blacked out but I was still there wishing I was dead. I pushed him off and broke a bottle on his head he got so furious that he started choking me and hitting me and suffocating me with a pillow saying he was going to kill me, and put me in a black bag after he cut me in pieces. I finally managed to escape running but he dragged me down the steps and forced me in his car. I threw myself out the car luckily near my godmotherís house. She called the police and this man went to jail. I was 15 and he was 33. I am now 16. This is the first time I ever opened up and spoke about it. I feel so relieved but so scared.
by amberon 26 May 2005
I was only 2 when my first rape happened. It was my father's best friend at the time. Then when I was 8 my cousin Christopher molested me, when I was 15 my other cousin Zach would molest me in my sleep, I would wake up with him trying to put his penis inside me. Then in June and July of last summer my boyfriend at the time would sometimes force me to have sex with him. I moved out of state to Texas. My Brother, thinking I was sleeping would rub and suck my chest. And then try to force his hand down my pants. And one time I woke up with my hand on his penis. Another time I woke up with my pants down and he was trying to put his penis inside me. Then one day I finally had a witness. But still no one believed me when I spoke up. That was until the day my witness told the truth of what he saw.
by Tiaon 25 May 2005
I was sexually abused by my own father very early in my childhood. Actually, I didn't have much fun growing up. I believe he began abusing me before the age of three. I had my first memory when I was three, and these happened only months ago. It took decades for me to recover anything. My mother was the main abuser, so I guessed I focused on her when I was in therapy. She was brutal. I don't remember any peace.
by Susanon 25 May 2005
When I was about five, my cousin started touching me. At first I thought that it was normal but something just kept telling me that it wasn't. Whenever I stayed at my Aunt's house he would always want me to go in his room and "play". This would usually entail me having to strip naked and him touching me all over, including my vagina. He never penetrated me because at that time I'm not even sure that he knew anything about sex or rape for that matter. Anyway, almost decades down the line and I'm depressed, cutting, taking pills, skipping school you name it. This is the first time Iíve ever even written down what he did to me. I'm not ashamed, but I just don't know how to cope. (By the way this happened in Denmark, I live in England now)
by Abbie Nicholason 24 May 2005
I was only 7 when it happened, now I am 14 and I still never told. My parents were separated and I lived with my mom, she doesnít really care so I was out all the time. I always slept at this girlís house and her brother who was a lot older then I had a crush on me. But I was 7 so I didnít even know about boys. Well one time when I was there he touched me, and then he raped me. I didnít know it was wrong or bad. I told him he was hurting me but he didnít stop. He did it often, almost everyday for about six months. He told me it was my fault and I wanted it. He also said I better not tell anyone. He said if I did he would hurt me worse. I was so scared and still to this day that secret is buried deep inside of me. I've been suffering lately though, I have horrible nightmares and bad flashbacks. I know I should tell my step-mom but I am so scared I donít know what to say.
by ashleigh on 24 May 2005
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This site is offered for support of other survivors, it is not meant to be a substitute for any kind of professional help. I don't have any qualifications or training in therapy, I am by no means a professional. I claim no responsibility for the use of this web site, use of content, or content of any links leading from this site. If you are in a crisis situation I urge you to contact your local rape crisis center or health care professional.