My grandfather molested me. That's my mother's father. He molested/raped her as well. My oldest brother also molested me forever, however, I only remember a few instances. I can't think about how to process it all out of me. It's all trapped inside me. The pain is almost unbearable. Sometimes there's a thumping in my body. It's almost as if something is inside me hitting me from the inside trying to get out. I think it's all the bad stuff trying to come out...I don't know how to reach it or process it out of me. I'm lost!
by michelleon 28 Oct 2005
I donít remember what happened to me but I get what I can only really call phantom pains. When I was around two, my neighbor was touching me and making me touch him in return. The only reason I know this is because my father caught him in the act. I only just found out about a month ago and I keep getting flashes.
In a way I sort of always knew, even though I was so young my subconscious hung onto the memories. I donít really want to remember and I keep trying to push the flashes into the back of my mind, but I know that the only way that I'm going to be able to cope with this information is to confront it.
It may have been roughly two decades ago but it still in its own way ruined that innocent part of me. I'm just glad that I was too young to understand.
by Shannonon 27 Oct 2005
I can't believe this has happened (and is happening) to so many people. I feel for all of you out there who've been raped or abused, I've been through it once too.
My mum was in England with my grandpa at the time and my brother, sister and I were left with my dad for around 10 days. On one of those days as I was walking past my dad's room to go to my own, right after having a shower, my dad called me into his room. I told him to wait a second because I had to get dressed but he insisted that I just go to him. (I was only around 6 years old at the time and I didn't know anything about sex). I went into the room and saw him lying on his bed naked and he asked me to lie down next to him.. again I insisted I go get dressed first but he told me to shut-up and obey so I did. He made me do things to him and after a while he let me go and that was it. I was confused and didn't know what had just happened and I guess I forgot about it then. A while later I got a flashback of what happened and I told my sister about it. Apparently she had seen me go in his room that day and 'knew' what was going to happen but was too young and helpless to do anything about it. She also told me that he was doing the same to her, the difference being that with me it was just once but the bastard did it to her for practically her whole childhood. I hate my dad with a passion but me and my sister have to act as though nothing ever happened and live as normally as we can (which we do). We talk about it occasionally but it hurts too much. We decided never to tell our mum because we don't want her going through such pain. My sister is now 18 and I'm almost 17. She is the person I look up to the most in this world and I love her to death. I have recently told my boyfriend about this and he's been so great and I love him with all my heart.
by T.H. on 23 Oct 2005
Hello my name is April and I am kind of scared to tell my story so I will do the best that I can.
I was so young when my father started raping m. I always told him no, "I don't want you to hurt me any more PLEASE ". This lasted until I was nine years old. And the abuse got worse. For years I have been blamed for what my father did to me and the shame and everything else that comes along with it.
Well this is all I can write it hurts to even get the word father out of my mouth.
by april lewison 23 Oct 2005
I was raped by a boyfriend when I was 11, he was 15. I am now 18, and a freshman in college. I did not tell anyone about the rape until I was 16. My mom did not find out until I was 17, and when I told she said, "oh well that explains a lot." Then it was dropped. No one else in my family knows and the guy that did it still lives two trailers down from me. This year I'm beginning to remember a lot of details, not that I didn't before but now I am trying to deal with them. Unfortunately for me, everyone I talk to about it (therapist, friends,etc.) say I should be over it by now. But I'm not and now I am dealing with it on my own. If anyone has any advice of what I should do please email me. I am lost right now and the memories are getting more intense and happening more often. Please help if you can.
by Destinyon 23 Oct 2005
Prev | 1 | | 2 | | 3 | | 4 | | 5 | | 6 | | 7 | | 8 | | 9 | | 10 | | 11 | | 12 | | 13 | | 14 | | 15 | | 16 | | 17 | | 18 | | 19 | | 20 | | 21 | | 22 | | 23 | | 24 | | 25 | | 26 | | 27 | | 28 | | 29 | | 30 | | 31 | | 32 | | 33 | | 34 | | 35 | | 36 | | 37 | | 38 | | 39 | | 40 | | 41 | | 42 | | 43 | | 44 | | 45 | | 46 | | 47 | | 48 | | 49 | | 50 | | 51 | | 52 | | 53 | | 54 | | 55 | | 56 | | 57 | | 58 | | 59 | | 60 | | 61 | | 62 | | 63 | | 64 | | 65 | | 66 | | 67 | | 68 | | 69 | | 70 | | 71 | | 72 | | 73 | | 74 | | 75 | | 76 | | 77 | | 78 | | 79 | | 80 | | 81 | | 82 | | 83 | | 84 | | 85 | | 86 | | 87 | | 88 | | 89 | | 90 | | 91 | | 92 | | 93 | | 94 | | 95 | | 96 | | 97 | | 98 | | 99 | | 100 | | 101 | | 102 | | 103 | | 104 | | 105 | | 106 | | 107 | | 108 | | 109 | | 110 | | 111 | | 112 | | 113 | | 114 | | 115 | | 116 | | 117 | | 118 | | 119 | | 120 | | 121 | | 122 | | 123 | | 124 | | 125 | | 126 | | 127 | | 128 | | 129 | | 130 | | 131 | | 132 | | 133 | | 134 | | 135 | | 136 | | 137 | | 138 | | 139 | | 140 | | 141 | | 142 | | 143 | | 144 | | 145 | | 146 | | 147 | | 148 | | 149 | | 150 | | 151 | | 152 | Next
This site is offered for support of other survivors, it is not meant to be a substitute for any kind of professional help. I don't have any qualifications or training in therapy, I am by no means a professional. I claim no responsibility for the use of this web site, use of content, or content of any links leading from this site. If you are in a crisis situation I urge you to contact your local rape crisis center or health care professional.